


instant regret

by chameleonchanging



Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-29
Updated: 2017-07-29
Packaged: 2018-12-08 13:17:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11647338
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chameleonchanging/pseuds/chameleonchanging
Summary: Percival is in hospital and some of Grindelwald's supporters come by to finish the job.It ends poorly. For the supporters, that is.





	instant regret

As soon as Percival had been found he’d been sent to the hospital, and Theseus had leaned on the Minster of Magic for extended leave to help with the recovery process. For a month, he’d been at Percival’s bedside waiting for him to wake, and since then he had made himself Percival’s shadow, keeping track of every treatment and every appointment and coaxing Percival through physical therapy.

They were finishing their last lap around the ward, Percival leaning heavily on his new cane with Theseus on his other side. “You’re awful,” Percival grumbled between breaths. “You’re even meaner to me than Healer Jordan.”

“Yes, well, I also like you more than Healer Jordan,” said Theseus. “Come on now, it’s just a few more steps and you can lie down.”

“That’s. What you said. Thirty minutes ago,” said Percival, who was several weeks into PT and very familiar with the casual mis-estimation of when he would be finished with his exercises. 

“And this time I even mean it,” said Theseus as they rounded the corner to Percival’s room.

Where eight men were waiting for them. None of them looked particularly threatening, even though they all had their wands out and pointed in generally the right direction. Percival was mostly sure none of them had any experience dueling outside of school and mentally marked them all down as idiots for taking on two veteran aurors.

“The Dark Lord sends his greetings,” said Idiot A.

“Gellert Grindelwald can eat shit,” Percival replied, at which point he tuned out most of the subsequent rantings about the supremacy of wizardkind in favour of watching Theseus’ eyebrows creep higher and higher. 

“We’ll be honored among wizardkind forever for removing scum like you,” said Idiot E when Percival tuned back in. He was standing unfortunately close by when he tried a  _Stupify,_ blocked easily on reflex with a charm.

“No, no, be my guest,” said Theseus with a little half-bow. “You’re owed, Percival.”

Percival narrowed his eyes, hefted his cane, and aimed for the shins. While Idiot E was bent over clutching at his leg, he followed it up with a wordless  _Expulso_ , relocating Idiot E and a supplies cart halfway into the wall.

His insincere smile showed teeth. “Who’s next?”

* * *

“Walk me through this one more time,” Seraphina said, looking down at the collection of would-be Grindelwald supporters trussed up along the wall in Percival’s ransacked hospital room in various states of discomfort and misery. She jabbed a finger in their general direction and waved at them, eliciting a collection of terrified whimpers. “How exactly did this happen?”

“Well,” said Theseus, “I, an important diplomat on business from the Ministry -”

“Cut the crap, Scamander,” said Seraphina. “You’re here on a visitor’s visa to see your spouse.”

Percival, the spouse, snorted.

“And you,” Seraphina said, rounding on him. “What do you have to say for yourself?”

“Normally I’d call this overkill and tell my aurors not to do it again, but in my defense, their pasty German boss put me in the hospital and then they tried to finish the job,” said Percival, who had taken up occupancy of the only chair in the room that had survived the carnage, his cane-turned-makeshift-wand resting over his knee. “At least we only broke one room this time?”

Seraphina made a face. “Someone will be by to pick them up.  _Don’t_ traumatize them any more, and put everything back where it was before you two decided to brawl. And Percival, one of these days you’re going to have a kid, and when that kid turns out to be  _exactly like you_  I will point and laugh.”

“You’d better hope not, Seraphina,” said Percival. “You’ll be godmother.”

Her features softened. “You’re all right? Both of you?”

“Not a scratch on us,” said Theseus, one hand on Percival’s shoulder, again the dutiful shadow.

“Good,” said Seraphina. “I’ll expect a report by tomorrow, then,” she said on her way out the door.

“Of course, Madame President,” said Percival, settling in to wait for their backup.

**Author's Note:**

> Based on a prompt from blackjacksbest: Thesival!!! Badass husbands just obliterating some bad guys who thought they would try Percival after the pasty german
> 
> (these three totally have history together. you know how you get together with old friends again and suddenly you’re all whatever age you were way back when? ‘way back when’ was before they grew up.)
> 
> Find me at chameleonchanging.tumblr.com


End file.
